30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself

I was fortunate enough to have coffee Wednesday with a man that I have come to respect very much over the past couple of years. I have struggled with many issues regarding how I am handling family and friends in my life lately, and I was looking for some guidance. As we sat and talked for that hour or so, I had one of those crystallizing moments in my brain.

Although others had told me that it was happening, I realized that I was allowing myself to be used by a friend. I am not angry about this- I think this person needed me to help enable them. And as time went on, I would seek out ways to keep that person happy. I honestly believed that if I could do something to make her happy, that it might ease her burden and inspire her to work toward positive things in her life. My intentions were always good- not always pure- but always good. In so many ways, my relationship with this person has made me a better person. I have become much more selfless and giving, and I have felt a sense of worthiness that I have done good things for a person who has been dealt a shit sandwich in life. But at the same time, I believe that I have compromised many of the core characteristics of who I am, and I have diminished my self-worth. I came to the point in this relationship, where I believe that it became almost completely one-sided. Well no more.

While I love my friend, I can no longer support her in this capacity. If she wants to be a part of my journey, then she is welcome to come along. If she decides to do so, then I know that her decisions will be helpful to moving her life in a positive direction, and not self-destructive, as they currently are. I have great and wonderful things in my future, and cannot afford to head in a negative direction.

During coffee Wednesday, my friend gave me some wonderfully sound advice. He also gave me some resources to read through, which have also helped me further. The link below was also posted online by another good friend, but it made me realize that I have been doing many of the things in this article to myself, and that I need to stop it, and focus on me for a change!

I hope my friend takes the time to really read the link below. If she does, and truly does a self-reflection, she will see what I see, and what many others who know her see, whether they have the courage to tell her this or not.

As for me, my journey continues. There will be many speed bumps, I'm sure. However, in time, and with the help of my good friends, I know that I will accomplish things that I could never imagine! I am on my way!

30 Things To Stop Doing To Yourself